It's day 14 of the isolation here in Austria and each day brings that little bit more of negativity and excruciating pain of not being able to play the sport I live for. But not only am I living on false hope of my season occurring anytime soon, I am also living with the pain of not knowing if and when I can go home to my family. It's difficult to be living in isolation without being surrounded by your family. Each day I wake up and fall into the same routine. Make breakfast, workout within the morning hours, make lunch, another workout in the afternoon and make dinner. Finding ways to waste the hours in the day is becoming harder and harder. That's what is making not being in isolation with my family even more difficult. I want to be spending time with my sisters, playing board games, biking around the property, swimming in the pool and enjoying their company which I haven't been able to do in years. Then being able to have special moments with my mum, playing black queen, taking photos, going on adventure walks and so on.
At this stage in my career, gaining my first professional contract and situating myself in a new country, it is also a transition phase in my life. Transitioning into a more mature, responsible and pragmatic young adult. As much as it pains me not being able to get home right now, I have to look at the bigger picture. I am now a professional footballer, I am an owned player by a club that has given me my first opportunity to start my footballing career. It's important for me to remember that and stay focused on my future. At the moment I am awaiting word from the club, the league association and the Austrian government whether my season will indeed be voided and I will get the chance to head home for a suitable amount of time. My mindset is torn in two, one half is wanting to get on the next flight out of Vienna to New Zealand and the other half is staying focused on staying fit, healthy and positive for when the season comes back around.
So at this point in time, as hard as things may get, I need to remember that the time will come to head home. I continue to workout and stay fit in order to keep my mind focused and be ready for whatever comes next. People around the world are in much worse situations than me. I am thankful and feel lucky to be in a very healthy state. As much as the unknown is affecting my mindset, I won't let it affect my football and my future within the sport I live for.
At this stage in my career, gaining my first professional contract and situating myself in a new country, it is also a transition phase in my life. Transitioning into a more mature, responsible and pragmatic young adult. As much as it pains me not being able to get home right now, I have to look at the bigger picture. I am now a professional footballer, I am an owned player by a club that has given me my first opportunity to start my footballing career. It's important for me to remember that and stay focused on my future. At the moment I am awaiting word from the club, the league association and the Austrian government whether my season will indeed be voided and I will get the chance to head home for a suitable amount of time. My mindset is torn in two, one half is wanting to get on the next flight out of Vienna to New Zealand and the other half is staying focused on staying fit, healthy and positive for when the season comes back around.
So at this point in time, as hard as things may get, I need to remember that the time will come to head home. I continue to workout and stay fit in order to keep my mind focused and be ready for whatever comes next. People around the world are in much worse situations than me. I am thankful and feel lucky to be in a very healthy state. As much as the unknown is affecting my mindset, I won't let it affect my football and my future within the sport I live for.
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